An Advisory Column ANN PAPAYOTI
All my life, I have been the go-to-girl for friends experiencing “problems.” I likely could have started my “Dear Annie” column decades ago! My high school yearbook quotes a classmate describing me as a “good listener.” However it wasn’t until long after high school that I recognized listening with empathy as an invaluable and innate skill – it was so natural for me. I thought it was just what everyone does for people they care about!
I am passionate about helping people transform their lives after a deep hurt, significant loss, and/or a tough transition. As a professional coach, the words spoken and unspoken matter when it comes to their heart and wellbeing.
My commitment to you is to use my skills, experiences, and wisdom to help you make the personal “shift” necessary to find a path through the storm, venture with confidence into the unknown and rediscover yourself along the way with a few lighter times — a touch of humor!
“Dear Annie” is designed to answer your questions by putting you in the right direction of where the shift needs to happen in your life. I hope that once you act, you will experience the beginning of the breakthrough you seek.
Start sending in your questions and enjoy having the Life Coach answer them!
Here's a BONUS:
Everyone who submits a question for consideration to be included in the column will be awarded a “Free One-Year Subscription” to Inspirations for Better Living digital magazine.
To submit, write to me with your questions at: DearAnnie@InspirationsForBetterLiving.com
A Special Invitation to Participate and Receive A Free Gift. Please Take Action As Soon As Possible.
Hi Everyone! Here is an excellent way for you to participate in our Magazine. Please check out our “Dear Annie” Advisory Column, written by Ann Papayoti. She is a highly skilled expert, author, educator, and relationship specialist. Ann will be answering selected questions from our readers.
We all have certain happenings in our lives, which we can use a second opinion, some advice, or experienced guidance. Here is an opportunity to have an expert assist you in navigating your life. Ann combines compassion with insight and a dash of humor to help people make a “Shift” happen in their lives. Her past work is to help put them in the right direction where they think the shift needs to occur and experience the beginning of the breakthrough they seek.
As a BONUS, everyone who submits a question for consideration to be included in the column will be awarded a Free One‑Year Subscription to Inspirations for Better Living digital magazine. The Free Gift is our Thank You for taking the time to participate and sharing your journey with us!
So, write and send your questions to Ann and enjoy having a Life Coach answer them. Here is the address: DearAnnie@InspirationsForBetterLiving.com
Dear Annie: I used to be my daughter's best friend. We shared everything, and she often came to me first with news or problems. Now that she's a young adult, she has a busy job and a serious boyfriend. I feel pushed aside. Most of the time, I only hear from her when she's driving and has a few spare minutes. We had talked about taking a short vacation together, something just for us, but she recently returned from a trip with her boyfriend and now says she can't take more time off work. I'm hurt and don't know what to say without sounding needy or making things worse. How do I stay close to her without pushing her away?— Missing My Girl
Dear Missing: Your letter captures a transition that many parents face but few talk about openly: when our children grow into adulthood, the relationship naturally shifts. The daughter who once relied on you for companionship and guidance is now building a life that includes work demands and a romantic partner. That doesn't mean she loves you any less — it means she's doing the hard work of becoming independent.
Instead of framing this as being “pushed aside,” try approaching it as an evolution. Express your feelings without blame: “I miss our time together and would love to plan something, even if it’s just a coffee and a walk.” Make the invitation specific and easy to say yes to. A weekend trip might feel impossible right now, but a coffee date or a Sunday brunch can be manageable.
Meanwhile, nurture your own interests and friendships. The more you invest in your own life, the less pressure your daughter will feel and more she'll naturally want to connect. Love that is steady, warm, and non-demanding will always be the magnet that draws her back.
— AnnieDear Annie: This upcoming Thanksgiving will be the first without my beloved husband. Everyone keeps reminding me to “focus on gratitude,” but all I can think about is the empty chair at the table. I feel guilty that I can't summon much thankfulness when my heart is so heavy with grief. Is it possible to feel gratitude and grief at the same time? How do I get through a holiday that feels more painful than joyful?— Heavy-Hearted at the Table
Dear Heavy-Hearted: Yes, grief and gratitude can — and often do — coexist. They may seem like opposite feelings, but they are both signs of love. Grief is the ache of missing someone who mattered deeply; gratitude is the quiet recognition that you were blessed to share life with them. The tears you shed are not a failure to be grateful — they're proof of the bond that still lives in your memory.
Give yourself permission to feel it all. You don't have to put on a brave face or force cheerfulness for anyone. Let the day be imperfect. You might start a simple ritual, such as lighting a candle, sharing a favorite memory, or setting a small token at the empty chair to honor your husband. Those gestures can transform sorrow into a moment of connection.
Gratitude isn't about denying your loss. It's about noticing the love that remains—family, friends, memories, even a warm meal shared. The heart is big enough to hold both the pain of missing and the quiet blessings of today.
— Annie
Instead of framing difficult relationship changes as being “pushed aside,” approach them as natural evolutions. Express your feelings in specific, low-pressure ways and offer manageable invitations. At the same time, invest in your own life and friendships; steady, non-demanding love is what often brings people back when they're ready.
Ann Papayoti — Founder of SkyView Coaching. Email: DearAnnie@InspirationsForBetterLiving.com. More at: skyviewcoaching.com. Listen to Ann's podcast: Soul CPR Healing.